Didn't find what you were looking for? Search here for more!
(Mali ba? Hindi ba ito gusto mo makita? I-type at hanapin dito!)

All the things my mother taught me:
TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE – “If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside – I just finished cleaning!”
RELIGION – “You better pray that will come out of the carpet.”
FORESIGHT – “Make sure you wear clean underwear, in case you’re in an accident.”
FLEXIBILITY – “Will you *look* at the dirt on the back of your neck!”
STAMINA – “You’ll sit there ’til all that spinach is finished.”
WEATHER – “It looks as if a tornado swept through your room.”
PHYSICS PROBLEMS – “If I yelled because I saw a meteor coming toward you; would you listen then?”
BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION – Stop acting like your father!”

What my father taught me:
LOGIC: “Because I said so, that’s why.”
IRONY – “Keep laughing and I’ll *give* you something to cry out.”
OSMOSIS – “Shut your mouth and eat your supper!”
HYPOCRISY – “If I’ve told you once, I’ve told you a million times – don’t exaggerate!!!”
THE CIRCLE OF LIFE – “I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”
ENVY – “There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who don’t have wonderful parents like you do!”
TIME TRAVEL: “If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”